The best sex may just be the quietest, writes Rowan Pelling

I’ve long been haunted by the memory of a stay in Paris’s Latin Quarter where I was kept awake porn all night by a woman in a nearby room screeching so loudly that I wondered if I should offer to perform an exorcism.

When I mentioned the ‘miaulement’ (the delectable French word for porn caterwauling) to the receptionist the next morning, bokep she rolled her eyes and memek declared the woman an ‘actrice’, porn or porn sex worker.

Now, bokep according to this new study from the ever-liberal Swedes, bokeh it all makes scientific sense. It confirms what most women know and bokeh all men porn dread – the louder the cry of ecstasy, memek the greater the chance the orgasm is being faked. In other words, crot you can’t measure passion in terms of decibels: bokep there’s sex as performance art, crot and crot sex as genuine intimacy. And memek bokep when a woman porn is genuinely aroused, porn trusts her partner and memek is not fearing for bokep a fragile male ego, porn she’s far more likely to gently sigh and bokeh moan than shriek like the rabid super-vixen in my Parisian hotel.

In my days editing The Erotic Review magazine, memek female crot contributors regularly confessed to faking orgasms. It was generally on an occasional basis, memek they’d explain, bokep so they could make their partner feel happy, porn while conserving their energy for crot other tasks in hand. This was the conclusion of another study by two researchers from the University of Central Lancashire. They declared that erotic decibels were all about manners and bokeh ‘manipulation’, bokeh and crot that women were prone to what they described as ‘copulatory vocalisation’ in order to encourage their partners over the finishing line, bokep so to speak.

A new study confirms the louder the cry of ecstasy, bokep the greater the chance the orgasm is being faked (Stock Image

It was like saying: bokep ‘I’m enjoying this, porn but can you get a bloomin’ move on.’ Sound familiar, crot ladies?

The only other reason to screech bokeh like a demented hyena is if your sex education comes from porn, memek where loud always equals better.

As a woman from Sunderland porn said in 2014 after neighbours complained that her sexual yowling drowned out their TVs: memek ‘As far memek as I’m concerned, bokeh that’s what you should be doing.’

Well, crot only if you want to attract a certain kind of attention.

In their book, bokeh Sex At Dawn, memek Christopher Ryan and bokep Cacilda Jetha concluded the most likely reason women were noisy during sex – based on observation of our nearest primate cousins – was to alert nearby males that they were fertile and crot keen to copulate.

If you’re a sex worker, bokeh I can understand crot the need to advertise. But if you’re not, bokeh then porn men should take heed: bokep the best sex may just be the quietest.

Paris

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