The best sex may just be the quietest, writes Rowan Pelling

I’ve long been haunted by crot the memory of a stay in Paris’s Latin Quarter where I was bokep kept awake all night by a memek woman bokeh in a nearby room screeching so loudly crot that I wondered if I should offer to perform an exorcism.

memek When porn I porn mentioned the ‘miaulement’ (the delectable French word for bokep caterwauling) to the memek receptionist the next bokep morning, memek she rolled her eyes and bokeh declared the woman an crot ‘actrice’, crot or crot sex worker.

Now, memek according to this new study from the ever-liberal Swedes, bokeh it all makes memek scientific sense. memek It crot confirms what most women know and bokep all men dread – the louder bokeh the cry of ecstasy, bokep the greater the chance the orgasm is being faked. bokep In other words, crot you can’t measure passion in terms of crot decibels: bokep there’s sex as performance art, crot and bokeh sex as bokep genuine intimacy. crot And memek when a woman is genuinely aroused, bokeh trusts her partner and bokeh is not fearing for bokeh a fragile male ego, memek she’s far more likely to gently sigh and crot moan bokeh than shriek like the porn rabid super-vixen in my Parisian hotel.

memek In my days editing The Erotic Review magazine, porn female bokeh contributors regularly confessed to faking orgasms. It was generally on an porn occasional basis, crot they’d porn explain, bokep so they could make their partner feel porn happy, crot while conserving their energy for bokep other tasks in hand. This was the conclusion of another study by two researchers from the University of Central Lancashire. They declared that erotic memek decibels were all about manners and memek bokep ‘manipulation’, bokeh and memek that women were prone to what crot they described as ‘copulatory porn vocalisation’ in order to crot encourage their partners over the finishing line, memek so to speak.

A new study confirms the louder the bokep cry bokep of ecstasy, porn the greater the chance the porn orgasm is being faked (Stock Image

It was like saying: crot ‘I’m enjoying this, bokep but can you get a memek bloomin’ move on.’ Sound familiar, crot ladies?

crot The only other memek reason to screech like a demented hyena bokep is if your sex bokep education comes from porn, bokeh where loud porn always equals better.

As a woman from Sunderland porn said in 2014 after neighbours complained that her sexual yowling drowned out their TVs: porn ‘As far memek as I’m concerned, memek that’s bokep what you should be doing.’

Well, crot only porn if you want to attract a certain kind bokep of attention.

In their book, memek Sex At Dawn, porn Christopher Ryan and porn Cacilda Jetha concluded the most likely reason women were noisy during sex – based on observation of our nearest primate cousins – was to alert nearby males that they were fertile and memek keen to copulate.

If you’re a crot sex worker, porn I can understand porn the need to advertise. But if you’re not, bokeh then men should take heed: porn the best sex may just be the quietest.

Paris

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